WC Fields. * Jim Rohn – American author, businessman and entrepreneur “There cannot be a crisis next week. As a writer, she had to take pen to paper or her stories would remain phantoms in her mind. Mark Twain Every day we present the best quotes! Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. Business is the most exciting game. A consultant is someone who takes the watch off your wrist and tells you the time.

We’ve compiled the largest list of funny quotes to make you laugh out loud. By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. Here is a list of some funny, inspiring, and thought-provoking quotes that are about business—or that can be applied to the business world.

Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. Benjamin Franklin was one of the founders of the United States of America, but even beyond that revolutionary achievement, he was an inventor and businessman who knew the importance of having the right tools for the job. Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

Never invest in anything that eats or needs repairing. My schedule is already full.” Henry Kissinger. Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason. People get caught up in the product and forget the worth of anything lies in the process. Oscar Wilde, Don’t corner something meaner than you. * Sergey Brin – one of the founders of Google Inc. Are you feeling inspired? Run your idea up the flagpole and see if anyone salutes it. The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. Every employee rises to the level of his own incompetence. Most of us have ambitions to climb the career ladder, but often, as American poet, Robert Frost, points out, getting to the top means devoting even more of your precious time to work.

September 3, 2020, 6:34 pm, by “I don’t want yes-men around me.

Roy L. Smith. Chesterton, a writer of paradoxical stories, is the contrarian on our list. This statement might confuse at first, but once you get it, like a Zen koan, it makes perfect sense. I’d have to throw myself in front of a train." If you continue to use this site we will assume that you are happy with it. Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of its behind. Top 15 Inspirational Quotes By Steve Jobs About Life And Business 31 Entrepreneurship Quotes And Advice On Starting A Business 5 Business Stories Of Famous Women Entrepreneurs Entrepreneurship Quotes – Some Of The Greatest From The Greatest Entrepreneurship Trends/Forecasts – More Woman Entrepreneurs By 2020 Motivational Business Quotes 21 Mind Your Own Business Quotes And Sayings Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot. It is these problems that we face which build our character, engage our creativity and build humility.

"Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell.” — Edward Abbey, author and environmental advocate, "Success is not final; failure is not fatal. A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost. Best funny quotes selected by thousands of our users! Don’t corner something meaner than you. March 22, 2011, 7:28 am If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? Do not underestimate your abilities. If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you’ll get change. . We all know that the world of business can be a pretty serious place. "Carlin on Campus". She got kicked upstairs. In the business world, the rearview mirror is always clearer than the windshield. Nothing annoys them more. Ford motors founder, Henry Ford, provides a challenge to all those guides and articles that talk endlessly about giving the customer what they want. As you get older three things happen. * Ted Turner – American entrepreneur, the founder of the news network – CNN However, it also applies to business. Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. Don’t worry about people stealing your ideas. Britain’s first female Prime Minister, Margaret Thatcher was known as the Iron Lady. Try ProjectManager.com and get award-winning online tools that help you plan projects and track processes in real time. Andrew manages the Elegant Marketplace and looks after the Developers, product updates and general maintenance of the Elegant Marketplace Website. Explore 1000 Business Quotes by authors including Mark Twain, Confucius, and Khalil Gibran at BrainyQuote. If you’re keeping your eyes on what can go wrong, it will go wrong. He speaks for the pig-headed and visionary alike. Even if it costs them their jobs.” Samuel Goldwyn. Even if you fail at your enterprise, if you enjoy the process, then you’ll be happy. Further transparency into the process is given by the kanban board view, which keeps teams working on only those high-priority tasks and allows managers to see what everyone is working on and where they are in that process. Writer and former dotcom businessman, Godin is saying that talk is cheap, but in a nicer way. Yes, ideas are a dime a dozen, but the real meat on those bones comes from trying to realize them. Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian. And laughter truly is the best medicine for your soul. Always forgive your enemies.

The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory. “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, p.372, Simon and Schuster. Inspiration is great, but there’s no point in reinventing the wheel.

People should take failure as a badge of honor. She should go far. If at first you don’t succeed; you are running about average. Managing your team has never been easier.

100 Funny Business Quotes She got kicked upstairs. "Sell a man a fish, he eats for a day. Malcolm S. Forbes quotes, It is better to spend money like there’s no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there’s no money. If you would like to know the value of money, try to borrow some. With failure comes failure. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two. At some time in the lifecycle of every organization, its ability to succeed in spite of itself runs out. It is also so with business. Resources are exploited by businesses to achieve their goals. Related: 10 Strategies for Successful Project Execution. High-level project views from the real-time dashboard automatically track progress across six metrics. Franklin D. Roosevelt. It wastes your time and it annoys the pig. Bob Harrington Avoiding bad decisions is aided, of course, with careful planning. Tell them what you’re going to tell them, tell them, then tell them what you told them. Quotes About Business, Societal, and Individual Growth “There is a certain relief in change, even though it be from bad to worse! by – Kirk Kirkpatrick.

Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. Ask any failure. "Biography/ Personal Quotes". Everyone must work, but for many of us that job isn’t just a paycheck, it’s an opportunity to express ourselves and make something better.

“Why join the Navy if you can be a pirate?” Steve Jobs. The president knows a lot about failure and success. It’s as if they’re already there. Alan Clark, I’m not the smartest fellow in the world, but I can sure pick smart colleagues. What the father of automotive automation is imparting with this quote is that success is as much a mind game as it is determined by fate. “Abraham Lincoln, wisdom & wit”, Peter Pauper Pr. TS Eliot Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it? Just having the courage to do that is the hallmark of success. Winston Churchill, A budget tells us what we can’t afford, but it doesn’t keep us from buying it. He has hit rock bottom and started to dig. FUNNY BUSINESS QUOTES. “I don’t want yes-men around me. Never try to teach a pig to sing. If you’re having a stressful day in the office, or you’re about to embark upon a to-do list as long as your limbs, here are some funny business quotes to brighten up your day, and hopefully make you smile. * George Edward Maurice Kelly (E.M. Kelly) — Alice Kahn, American writer. We never spam and you can always hit the unsubscribe link in all our email communications, Dive straight into the feedback!Login below and you can start commenting using your own user instantly. Related: 10 Conflict Resolution Strategies That Actually Work. You never become a howling success by just howling. They compel people to start their days on the right foot. The business man asked him, "How much is two and two?"

—, "Competition brings out the best in products and the worst in people." September 1, 2020, 2:23 pm, by

Not only does laughter reduce stress, it lowers your blood pressure, gives you an excellent ab workout, and releases endorphins. September 1, 2020, 2:30 pm, by James Goldsmith, a financier and business tycoon, sums this up perfectly. BP Editors Joseph Heller, Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake. . The Greatest Business Ideas, Start-Ups, And Entrepreneurs, The stories of some of the most famous entrepreneurs, the greatest business ideas, and start ups. BP Editors If I advance any higher in this company, then this would be my career.

Now, get out there and change the world—one project at a time! — Karl Marx, philosopher and author, "The politicians say 'we' can't afford a tax cut.

Nothing annoys them more. There is a mistake in the text of this quote. Most successful people have been rejected along the way, but sometimes, you have to know when it’s time to throw the towel in. Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re right! When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Peter Drucker A company is known by the people it keeps.

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. * Lord Beaverbrook – British-Canadian businessman, owner of the newspaper Daily Express Branson’s Virgin has proven that from record labels to airlines, where there is a will there is a way. Successful people strive to move on. Get a Free 30-Day Trial of Our Online Software, 10 Motivational Speeches That Will Change Your Life, 10 Conflict Resolution Strategies That Actually Work, 10 Strategies for Successful Project Execution, Why You Need a Reliable Business Continuity Plan, Teamwork Quotes: The 25 Best Quotes About Working Together. Getting anywhere in business requires hard work and determination, but sometimes, you have to make time for a bit of fun. It is what we can make of the mess we have made of things. Vidal Sassoon, When you’re up to your armpits in alligators, it’s hard to remember to drain the swamp. Daydreaming might be creative, but creativity takes work. That might not be the definition of luck, but it does feel like good fortune. They slipped into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn’t looking.